Friday, December 13, 2013

Just Stopping By. . .

Dear Blogger,

I have been absent, I know.  I have been maintaining though.  Exercise is almost non-existent, food has been more naughty than usual but still usually controlled.  I must figure out the next path to take on this journey.  Christmas is coming so I may be detoured for a little longer, but I'll get back eventually.

I am lucky.  I have friends that inspire me.  I've seen some of their journeys (via social media) and they don't know it, but it reminds me of where I'm going and that I am not alone.  My lovely coworker (the one who gave me the flowers) is the most inspiring. Her achievements and her continued commitment to her own weight loss remind me to remain committed to keeping my own weight off.  There are also a few people that I grew up with, some more open with their achievements than others, but still it reminds me that I can do it too (maybe not quite to the same level as some, but that's my choice).

My New Years' resolution will be to get my ass back in gear.  I know it's a few weeks away, but I know that's what I want so I can say it now.  For now, I will wish you all a Merry Christmas (no political correctness here)! 


Wednesday, November 6, 2013

The Two Me's

I have discovered that there are two "Me's" happening.  The first "Me" is the semi-healthy Me who knows how great she feels after a run (or other exercise).  She knows the "high" that comes with it. Then there's the other "Me".  She's the lazy-Me.  The one who prefers to sit her tired ass on the couch.  Currently, that lazy-Me is winning.  Lazy-Me is beating the semi-healthy Me to death with a stick (metaphorically, of coarse).  Lazy-me is quite happy sitting on the couch, and semi-healthy me is letting her win.

I know I haven't been around here much, and I truly apologize.  I should be keeping this up to date but again, Lazy-Me is winning.  I would like to say that in terms of the food I have been eating there have been bad and good days.  I haven't gained weight but I'm pretty sure that as long as I'm not gaining the Lazy-Me will keep winning for a while at least.  I am hopeful that if I do notice a gain that the semi-healthy me will be back to kick Lazy-Me's ass!

Monday, October 14, 2013

Unsolicited Advice on How to Dine-Out

And now for some advice that you didn't ask for (but since you are reading this blog, maybe it interests you).

How to dine-out successfully (or semi-successfully)

If you know in advance that you are going out to a particular restaurant for a meal, go to their website and find the nutrition section.  Pick your meal from there so you know what you should order when you get to the restaurant.  Pay attention to the starters and sides too.

If you want to start with a salad, a simple garden salad is usually the best choice depending on the dressing, so check out what choices the restaurant offers and the nutritional info.  Check out the soups too, sometimes the choices have less calories than the salad with dressing.

Check out the side dishes in advance too.  Side dish choices sometimes vary at some restaurants depending on the day or season.  I suggest being aware of several so that if the one you want is unavailable you will still be able to make an educated alternate choice.

Beware of  buns, biscuits, and breadsticks!!!  For example, a Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuit has 150 calories and 8 grams of fat.  I can't resist them so I do sometimes have a second one but I am very aware of the extra calories this adds to my meal.  A breadstick at the Olive Garden has 140 calories and 2 grams of fat.  If you can resist the bread choices, even better, but one of my goals in this journey is to not feel deprived so I factor the bread choice into my meal and because I am planning my meal in advance I can factor my choices into my overall day!

I hope this helps you, I know it helps me.  I won't lie though, sometimes if I'm going out, I let that day be my "bad" day for the week.  However, I have noticed that I can't even eat as much "bad" stuff as I used too.  I get too full!  (And if you didn't get the chance to preplan your meal because of last-minute plans, search the app-store on your smart phone for a restaurant nutrition guide to keep on your device just-in-case.)

Saturday, October 12, 2013

One Step Back

I have been neglecting my posting duties.  I probably had stuff to say but between life and sometimes laziness, I haven't stopped by to write.

You know that saying that goes you take two steps forward and one step back? Well, I'm taking that step back right now and I'm here to say that it's okay if that happens.  As long as you remember to step forward again.  I have been unmotivated and I have been letting myself make bad choices.  I knew that I would be miserable if I didn't let myself take this step back and I knew it would pass.  I have already decided that I need to get my ass back in gear on Tuesday as that will mark two weeks from my last run.

I'm sure I have mentioned before that even when I'm bad, I'm not horribly bad. I am always conscious of what I'm eating, the portion, and the overall amount of bad choices I make in a day.  I will never sit down with a big bag of chips again, I will never take more than two cookies, although I might eat the whole chocolate bar instead of half (but I haven't).  Most importantly, I am aware of the consequences of my decisions.

So when you "slip" or "cheat" or "fall off the food wagon" or whatever you want to call it, remember that you can choose to get past those bad choices and go forward again.  I have used this illustration earlier in my blog but it's always good to remember. . .

Thanks for reading, and I will try to stop by a little sooner next time!

Monday, September 16, 2013

Say What?!?

One-sixty-nine.  Say what?!?  Oh, yeah.  One-sixty-nine!

I finally broke the barrier!  I got below 170 pounds.  This doesn't mean that 160 will happen, but I am one pound closer.  I have been good (-ish), I have started working out with the dumbells for 15 minutes on some of my non-running days.  I have been getting through my runs by visualizing that I am losing the weight.  I am excited!

You know what was extra special about seeing 169 on the scale?  PMS.  Yup, I am all bloaty and it still said that!  I can't wait for the "after" weigh-in!



Saturday, September 7, 2013


I'm actually kind of happy with my body right now. I'm not skinny, but I'm skinnier then before.  I still have flab, rolls, whatever you want to call it.  I look in the mirror though and I see this good looking girl staring back at me.  I love my face.  My face is definitely thinner.
I love wearing clothes that fit!  I mean, I always wore clothes that fit me, but I can wear "skinny" jeans, you know, jeans that actually hug my body!  My capri's are form fitting, and the ones that aren't are already semi-too big on me.  I still try to make sure that my clothes are flattering and do not accentuate the bad curves. 
Being happy with my body does not mean that I'm done.  I'm still going to run.  I'm still going to try to eat my best (most of the time).  And I plan to start some short workouts at home with dumbells.  I am zapped from work this week, but I'm sure I will start soon enough.  My "wow" feelings are currently MIA, but that won't knock me down!

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Face Palm!

Went to McDonalds. . .ordered a wrap. . .may as well have ordered a burger when you look at the calories and fat.  Face palm!

That's all for today. (Fail!)

Sunday, September 1, 2013


That's how I feel; wow!  I wish I could feel like this all the time.

Last night I was eager for my run.  I did some great stretches before and after and I can feel a little pain in my hamstrings today and it makes me feel good!  The run itself has me puzzled because I can't, for the life of me [what does that saying really mean anyway?] figure out how I was managing to run for a half hour straight before my injury!  I ran with wrist weights too!  I usually take those off after the warm up (sometimes after the first run set).


I wish, I WISH I could feel like this all the time!  It's so satisfying!  I want these feelings to stick around for a while please.

Now, if only I felt wow like this when it came to housework!

Monday, August 26, 2013


Food. . .food is my enemy.  I'm sure every person trying to lose weight has said this at one time or another.  I am saying it now.  I cannot seem to curb the hunger lately.  I am always hungry!  (Yes, I know only "bad" food should be considered the enemy, but this is how I feel at this very moment so I am going with this feeling for now.)

I started thinking today that maybe this is the weight I am meant to be at.  That this is the weight that my body is comfortable with.  I got down to 170 without feeling deprived but if I expect to get lower then maybe it would require more changes that I am not willing to make.  For now, I plan to do my best to fight my urges and not give in.  I know that other people who are in to major fitness and/or diet would think I am not trying hard enough, not putting enough effort in, but to me, it was never about putting a lot of effort in (call me lazy).  It was about making enough changes to get where I needed myself to be and quite frankly, I am here.

I am not giving up, I am not taking a break.  This journey is not over.  I will continue to wherever it leads me.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

No One to Blame Except Myself

I have not been on my best behavior this week.  I have made bad choices, but I have done my runs.  Sunday I will run again. 

I, alone, made these choices.  I cannot blame anyone.  I cannot place blame on anything that has been brought into my environment.  I made the choice to eat it.  I was much better at choosing right in the beginning.  Lately though, I have been allowing myself to choose wrong.

It's much of the same-as-always, I know.  I cannot guarantee anything more exciting to read.  This is how the journey goes.  It's not always a smooth ride, but you cannot give up, you cannot throw in the towel.  You have to look at tomorrow as a new start.  It is a new day and you can make completely different choices.  You CAN choose to have more good days then bad.

Still my favorite!

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

What Was I Thinking?

It was a pretty good first week even if I did only lose one pound.  I mean who commits to losing weight the week before PMSing?!?  Me, that's who!

I did really feel good getting back in to running last week, and I'm looking forward to week two!  However Monday kicked my ass so I postponed running until today.  Then today we had no water and no power so we went out for dinner, no run!  Grrrrrr!  Really, I'm looking forward to it though.  Tomorrow, Friday, Sunday.  That's the plan!

Not much to say tonight but I really agree with this:


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

I Feel Good!

I feel good!  {Insert James Brown here}  Second run and I am amazed at how good I feel after.  Not physically good, but mentally good.  I am looking forward to run number three.

The part that does not feel good is my foot.  I changed insoles but I could still feel some discomfort in my foot while I was running.  I am feeling some pain now as well.  I will not give up, but I am upset that after wasting eight weeks resting my foot, it appears to still be a problem.  However, unless the pain becomes constant I will keep going.

Short and sweet tonight as I have nothing else to report!  Have a good night!

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

I Can Do It

"Day one" was easy.  Hopefully to be followed by an easy day two, three, four, five, and so on.  And I ran! Well, actually, jogged, but to me that's running.  I had some numbness in my toes while I was running, but no pain.  I am trying to be very conscious of how my foot hits the ground but I will try my other insoles next time to see if it helps. I also refused a very-yummy-looking cupcake!  To me, this was a huge indication of my readiness as I had no regret and no temptation to go back for it. 

Tonight (day two) I do have some pain in my foot.  I am praying that it is some sort of residual pain and that it doesn't worsen like it did when I injured it.  I want to run!  If I can't run I will be devastated.  I know that sounds drastic, but I really want to do it!

I still feel confident that I am ready to continue my journey.  I can't let anything stand in my way.  I want to succeed, I need to succeed.   I want to be the best me I can be!!!

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Another Day One

Yes, that's right, Monday will mark another day one.  This time it's serious.  It is time to get back into the swing of things.  I have seen how easy it was to be bad again, especially this last week.  I was super bad.  I'm ready. . .

I'm ready to be good again!

It's going to be hard.  I have been letting myself eat what I want, when I want to.  I have to be strict on myself and stick to the good stuff.  Lately, I just want to eat all the time.  I see some struggle in my near future.

Here is the most important part.  I'm gonna run.  Please, please let my foot be healed!  It feels okay and I plan to start slow so that I won't re injure or aggravate it again.  I am hoping that running is the solution to all of it!

I really hope the next time you hear from me that I will have good news to share.  If this doesn't work I am pretty confident that I will be feeling devastated.  I realize that "devastated" sounds extreme, but I really do believe that running is going to help put me back on the proper path.

And hopefully this will be the last "day one" I ever tell you about!!!

Saturday, August 10, 2013

What Happens When I Eat Bad?

What happens when I eat bad?  A fantastic question!

I'm tired, I'm cranky, I'm irritable.  I'm starting to get achy hips again.  Okay, all those things are actually quite normal for me, but I am sure they are more frequent and prevalent now.  I'm emotional!  Yes, I have always been an emotional person who cries easily, but it's waaaaaay worse now then it was when I was being good.

I have no doubt that my food choices contribute to these feelings but this is the part where I believe the exercise helps. . .I know I have said that you don't have to exercise to lose weight because I have lost weight without exercise. However, not only does the exercise help with losing weight but it helps me feel better overall.  As hard as I find it to run sometimes (my totally insane exercise of choice) it really does uplift me.  Look anywhere online and it will tell you: physical activity helps to elevate your mood.  Even if it's just a small amount of exercise.

SO. . .I'm not running, causing me to be tired, cranky, and irritable, therefore leading me to bad food choices, which in the circle of things make me feel tired, cranky, and irritable!  Ah-ha!  So when I run (exercise) I feel better about myself, therefore leading me to make better food choices so as not to undo the hard work I just did! 

We know I'm still going to eat the bad stuff but remember my favorite line: Everything in moderation.

I'm not sure that any of that actually makes sense, but what I am hoping is that once I return to running and eating better that all these things will go away!  Well, maybe they won't go away, but rather occur less frequently or less prominently.

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

I Want to Run

I know what it is that is pulling me down.  I NEED to exercise.  When I exercise I don't want to eat all the time.  When I'm done I may want to have a snack (sometimes bad), but usually I just want to be good.

I have never been a gym person.  I really have no interest in staying after work to use the gym either. I have thought about going to a gym outside of work, but I really can't see myself making that kind of commitment.

I want to run.

I still have some pain in my foot when I walk a small distance, but it is minor. I also get some numbness in my toes. I'm not sure what that signals.

I want to run.

"Two more weeks" I tell myself. Then I will start from scratch. This time I want to do the Couch to 10K.  It has been six weeks since I was injured so I figure that eight weeks should be long enough. The doctor recommended three but my research (and pain) indicated that was not long enough.  I probably should have seen a sports injury doctor.  Starting slow will help me determine if I really am ready.

I want to run.  

Who would have ever thought that those words would ever come out of my mouth? Certainly not me!

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Stress Eating Does Exist

I've had some good days, I've had some bad days.  I have lost three of those regained pounds and maybe I would have lost them all if I had been better.  I'm not going to complain though, and hopefully by this time next week I can be down the rest. . .although Tom will be paying a visit around then.

I'm a stress eater.  I would guess that many people probably are but some people are probably better at controlling themselves.  Did you know that stress increases the hormone called cortisol?  Higher levels of cortisol can make you crave sweet and salty food.  If anyone tells you there is no such thing as "stress eating", they might not have experienced it, but it does exist.

This week has been stressful.  I was promoted into a new position at work without warning.  Everything will be fine, but the initial transition has been overwhelming.   This, of coarse, leads me to bad food choices. These bad choices are mine and I think it's important that I can recognize that I make the bad choices because if I were to stop acknowledging the bad choices this journey would be over and I would be headed back in the wrong direction.  Again, as long as I can maintain, I will be happy. 

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Getting Back on Track

Since my injury I have been bad, very very bad.  I have done virtually no exercise and I have been eating mostly whatever I want.  At the beginning, even though I was eating what I wanted, I would still consciously think about what I was eating. So even if I was eating bad I wasn't totally bad. Then came holidays. . . and of course all the good habits went out the window.  At the end of it though, I realize that it is time to be good again and I am (mostly) ready to get to it.

Exercise? I still haven't figured out how I want to deal with that. For now I will stick to working on my food intake.  I have gained 4.4 pounds back. It's not the end of the world but I definitely don't want to let it get any worse.

Day one, it's hard. It's not like I haven't done this before. I just start thinking "HOW did I do this?"  It's now that I notice how quickly my calories are consumed in a day.  Really, it's the same as before, I just have to get back into good habits.  Tomorrow I will pick up some cucumbers and tomatoes which make really great snacks when you're running out of calories. I will also make a conscious effort to drink more water again because I have been slacking in that department as well.


Hopefully I will have what it takes to succeed. And hopefully I will be back here to visit sooner rather than later. If I'm back later then that probably means I have failed.

Thursday, June 20, 2013


I'm having such a hard time recently.  It's my own fault for letting myself have a break (mind you, life lead me to that break).  I have certainly been lacking on commitment though.

I had, at least, returned to running.  For a week and a half anyway. Now, I am injured and told to rest my foot for three weeks.  I have a bone chip on my fourth metatarsal.  The doctor said he didn't want to cast it, thank goodness!  For now, it's just rest and ice and pain meds if needed. 

At least if I was eating bad, I was still getting my runs in, but now what?  I must get my eating under control!  That's what! I have to stop making excuses and just do it!!!

I am thinking about other options for exercise.  Maybe I have to think about using the gym at work but more likely I should revisit bicycling.  I still don't have a bike, nor do I really have the funds to purchase one right now (saving for holidays).  If I decide to ride, I may have to borrow my sons' again like I did last summer.  Hopefully it would be a bit easier now that I have been running.

I'll let you know. . .

Sunday, June 9, 2013

Sometimes I Struggle

I did the twenty-two minute run.  Next is twenty-five.  I think I need to move the treadmill closer to the TV as it's not getting tired that bothers me, rather it's getting bored.  That's when I feel like I just want it to be over. I do listen to music and read while I run, but maybe watching a TV show might be better.

I'm still letting myself eat what I shouldn't or when I shouldn't.  Nothing super bad, no crazy binges, just more than I should.  I do want to lose more, but at the same time I have already done better than planned so maybe this internal argument when it comes to food is here to stay.  I know you're saying "self-discipline" but I'm not so great at that right now.

I've got some turmoil coming up in my day-to-day living in a couple of weeks also, and I am hoping that I can get through that while remaining somewhat on track. I will be out of routine during that time so the temptations to just grab-and-go will be constant.  I will do my best to keep good options available at all times.

Sometimes I feel like I'm writing too much about my struggles lately, but if you're just joining me you should know that it isn't always hard.  Reading back in my journey there have been struggles but where I am now wasn't as hard to get to as I would have thought either.  I have gone on for this long because there are always results from the struggles.  I may be at a stand-still in my weight-loss right now, but as long as I'm not gaining I still see it as a success.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Less Than Stellar

Well, my first five days of recommitment have been less than stellar.  Day one, which I mentioned earlier this week, was by far the best.  Day two was pre-planned self-sabotage. Day three was okay and I did my second run. Day four, um, not as good. And today, day five, two thumbs down. 

I want to be serious, I want to keep my goal in sight.  I won't let it slip away.  That is what's important.  As long as I don't slide backward it will be okay.

Tomorrow there will be another run, I'm hoping for twenty-two minutes with no walking break.  Hopefully I will also regain control of my willpower.  Aunt Flo has not been kind (not that she ever is) but hopefully that is the obstacle that I need to overcome this week.

Monday, June 3, 2013

Day One

Okay, not really.

Day one of getting back to things.  It was a good day! I did great with my food, I went for a run, and I was productive this evening.  

To ease back in to running, I started back on week 6 of Couch to 5k.  Day 1 is run five, walk three, run eight, walk three, run five.  Of coarse start and end with five minutes walking.  I forgot to warm up my arms (how quickly the warm up routine is forgotten) so I felt the pain in my shoulder joint again but I'll take care of that next time.

I have already pre planned sabotage for day two!  I invited my mom to Salisbury house tomorrow for dinner.  Yes, I do plan on having a yummy burger and fries! I guess this will be my bad day for the week, I do have to try to cut back to only one of those per week!

My productivity for the evening was making a quinoa salad.  This is only my second foray with quinoa.  It was rather time consuming preparing everything, but I'm looking forward to the end result for my lunch tomorrow.  Clean up is not my favorite productive activity though!


The finished product doesn't look as appetizing but my sampling tasted delicious.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

A New Goal

Sometimes I look in the mirror and I see a fat girl. Sometimes I look in the mirror and see a skinny girl.  Not skinny in the sense of being a stick, but skinny compared to where I used to be.  When I see the fat girl, I ask myself "If I see myself as fat now, how fat was I really before?"  

My point is that I don't really think I'm done.  I think I do have to aim for 160 even if it takes a long time to get there.  I am at 170 right now, and I should be happy, and I am. . .sort of, but I really do want to keep going.  Yes, I am publicly admitting to weighing 170 pounds! Yes, I am somewhat embarrassed by it. However, when I look at where I was and compare it to where I am now, it really was a huge accomplishment.  So, I don't care if it takes a whole year, I am setting 160 as my new goal!


P.S. For the record, I'm 5'5".

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Still Not Running

Still not running. I know, I know. . .The longer I wait, the harder it's going to be to restart. I have lost the weight that I put on in Vegas. It was not much, a pound or two, and may have just been bloating from the change in eating habits. I am officially down 54 pounds. 55 is so close, I can feel it! So why am I not running?

Well I can use all the excuses in the world but in the end it boils down to being busy and lazy.  Up until last weekend I was so tired I actually felt like I'd been drinking!  My new position at work has been mentally exhausting while I learn everything. On top of that, my kids' extracurricular activities have kept me super busy many evenings.  Physically though, my foot and shin feel well so I could run if I was determined.

For now I am not gaining weight and still losing it slowly so I will not fret too much. Once the pace settles down though I will definitely need to get my ass in gear again, or more specifically, my feet!

Saturday, April 27, 2013

I'm Back!

I'm back!  Or on my way back to normal at least. 

I went to Las Vegas last weekend and since I have been back I haven't been able to be consistent with eating or exercise. 

I started a new job two weeks ago and the training has been mentally exhausting, plus I missed two days when I was in Vegas which means I'm behind too.  Eating at work hasn't been bad though as there is no time!  I have been forgetting to take my vitamins there though and I have not been drinking enough water.  I have not necessarily eaten the best at home either.  

Exercise has been non-existent.  I'm not sure when I will get back to running.  With the amount of walking we did in Vegas, my tendonitis was super painful and has slowly been subsiding but it is not well enough to run on yet.  On top of that I got a shin splint!

I am hoping to get lots of rest this weekend so that I can get back into a groove next week.  Tomorrow I need to catch up on my household chores and get some groceries as my fridge is bare (except for a whole lot of cheese that I bought in the US).  I need to get some healthy choices in there.  And last, but not least, I hope to get back to running by mid-week.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Too Many Bad Days

Sliding. . .sliding. . .sliding. . .sliding.

Too many bad days happening and I can't stop.  I was bad today, not really bad, but bad enough when I know I have two bad days in a row around the corner.  I did not make the better choices today. . .and I chose the bad ones, the indulgent ones.  I have no one to blame but myself.

Tomorrow I will be good.  Tomorrow I will make better choices.  Tomorrow will be better.

As my "punishment" I will revise my first planned bad day, and I must follow through with that decision.  My second planned bad day will take place as planned because it's the one I have been waiting for!  It's getting together with a good friend (and our kids), eating somewhat bad, and planning our upcoming trip!
Here's the truth about my bad day today though. . .I chose to eat bad foods, and not in moderation as I usually encourage.  However the only real bad is that I will not have a so-called calorie deficit today.  By eating good food, being aware of portion sizes, and keeping the "bad" to a minimum (moderation) a person can usually get out of a day with a calorie deficit.  If you watch The Biggest Loser then you know that one pound of fat equals 3500 calories so the more often you can make it out of the day with a deficit, whether it be 100 calories or 500 calories, you are losing weight!

Monday, April 8, 2013

Getting It Done (Slowly)

52 pounds! It comes off slower now, but that's to be expected. Especially since I keep my effort minimal. One teenie-tiny pound at a time. . .it's fine with me! 160 still seems impossible, but really it isn't. Even if I never get there I truly am happy at what I have achieved so far.

I rocked a 30 minute run on Thursday. After completely bombing my Tuesday run after four days off, I was happy that I felt good on Thursday. I still haven't decided on the next step. If I can keep up at 30 I will always be happy if I CAN rock it.

I haven't had a chance to run since Thursday though.  My plans are to run tomorrow, Friday, Sunday, then either Tuesday or Wednesday before I leave for my mini-vacation to Las Vegas to see Bon Jovi!!!  I plan on being very, very bad (food-wise) while I'm away, so hopefully I will only put a couple pounds on, if any as we will be doing a lot of walking I'm sure.

Short and sweet tonight, but I just wanted to keep up to date on what has been happening for the last week or so.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Why Run?

One thing I decided (or realized) this past week was that when I run, even if the results are not my best, at least I'm doing something.  I mean it's not like I was going to do anything productive with that time (on most days anyway) so why not use that time to go for a run!

Why did I choose running as my go-to physical activity?  I would see someone jogging and think "I want to do that".  It would have been easy to give up when I realized how hard it actually was to get started, but I wanted to do it.  I'm still not great and maybe I will never be great but at least I'm doing it!

It's time to get things back on track after almost a week of being not-so-good.  I could say I tried, but not really.  I should hang my head in shame for how awful I was on Easter!  I really let myself go and it was the most I have overindulged in a very long time.  I definitely felt regret afterwards.  Regret? Yup!  Oh how uncomfortably full I was!!!  A lesson learned, I hope!  Being back at work after six days off actually does help with keeping things in order though.  I take all my food for the day with me so I can make sure my choices are good ones in advance.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Nachos and Oz

I have said this before and I will say it again. . .I'm sorry it has been a while between posts.  It's just that I don't have anything to talk about.  Nothing new and noteworthy has been happening, and I have had no new questions or revelations about my progress.  I'd rather not post just saying "today was a {fill-in-the-blank} day" or "this is what I ate", etc.  I need to be able to share something whether it be an accomplishment, a goal, a question, or even a frustration. 

I have made it to 30 minutes for three runs in a row now.  It's getting easier each time.  Not easy, just easier.  I imagine I should start trying for a longer distance but truthfully I'm not willing to commit to more time.  I suppose I could try running faster, but I don't want to commit the effort!  I know, I know, I should do one or the other already!  Let me think on it for a bit!

I took my kids to see Oz the Great and Powerful tonight.  I had nachos.  They are my favorite movie theatre treat and I have been looking forward to them all week!  I think it helps me to behave at other times if I already have something bad planned out.  That way I know I have to be good during the time leading up to it! 

It is spring break for the kids so tomorrow will likely involve eating on the go, and the weekend promises a birthday party and likely Easter dinner.   I will try my hardest to be good!  Willpower please don't fail me this week!

Thursday, March 21, 2013


I did it!  I made 30 minutes on my run last night!  I knew I had it in me, I just had to remember not to give up!  I felt good mentally afterwards, running definitely releases endorphins leaving me feeling that I am heading for some good days ahead (for food and exercise that is).

For the record, I did eat those cookies yesterday, but they saved me from a bigger calorie catastrophe. . .carrot cake!  I resisted the cake and ate my cookies and then I was satisfied.

Now here's the best news. . .I have officially lost fifty pounds! Nope, scratch that, fifty-one!  And it feels good!  I really feel like I should share my success with my friends (aka share this blog), however as proud as I am that I have lost fifty pounds, I also almost feel ashamed to admit that I had fifty pounds to lose in the first place.  I should have never had those first forty-five pounds to lose, I should have never let it get that bad.  I have to work up the courage to let it out there!  I can't believe how personal everything feels when I look at letting other people in.  I'm going to sit on it for a few days (or however long it takes) and hopefully work up the courage because I am actually VERY proud of myself for doing it!

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Looking Up

I finished off my last post by saying "There's always going to be some "down's" on this journey.  The important thing is not to give up and to know the "up's" will be there again soon!"  I am living by this right now because I am on a big slope of  "down",  and I really AM looking forward to the "up's" returning soon.  I know they are in there and I have to remember to find them soon!

I am hoping that today is the "up" day that I need.  I'm still super hungry (damn PMS) but I do plan on going for a run tonight.  I will also try my hardest to be good food-wise (although I probably will slip in a couple of small cookies!).  I really don't have a lot of time so the dishes will have to remain unwashed and probably a few other chores undone so that I can use the time for a run.

And I'm hoping it's a good run!  My body has had a four day rest from running so I am hoping to push it to 30 minutes again.  The rest of me is tired though.  I feel like if I can make the 30 minutes that I will be back climbing up-hill again.  I really want to be there!

Starting in a month I will be working a set shift at work.  I will no longer have to work the "late" shift and I am hoping that will help put difficult weeks, such as these, to a rest.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Not The Biggest Loser

I am not the Biggest Loser but I have lost 21.78% of my body weight so far.  I am not at a plateau but it is coming off slower and I understand that I need to get my ass in gear and do more if I want it to come off quicker.  I am not ready to dedicate myself to more.  When I'm ready, if I'm ready, I will know.  Right now I am content at continuing one teenie-tiny step at a time. 

I did have a "bad" week.  As I have said previously, my "bad" isn't even as bad as it really could be, or how bad it would have been nine months ago.  No weight lost, no weight gained since last Monday.  I am at 49 pounds lost.  Since I have already met my original goal of 45 pounds, every extra pound now is just a bonus.  PMS is killing me though!  Usually I want to eat everything in the house the day before, but this has been going on for three days!  Ugh! 

As for running, I managed 30 minutes last Wednesday, but every other time has been, well, unsuccessful.  I suppose I should look at every time I run as a success because at least I am trying, where as the mere thought of running a year ago would have had me cringing (or laughing). 

There's always going to be some "down's" on this journey.  The important thing is not to give up and to know the "up's" will be there again soon!

Friday, March 8, 2013

Plateau Perhaps

I really think that I have finally hit a plateau.  My weight has been teetering around 178 for the last month.  That's 47 pounds lost.  I really would like to get to 160 eventually but the thing is, I'm not really ready to change my current habits or break out a new workout routine, and I'm not willing to go to the gym.  Not yet.  Maybe never.  I still plan to maintain, and I hope to NEVER see a rise over 180 ever again!

Most of this past week's spare time has been spent spring cleaning.  There hasn't been time to run, but cleaning and vacuuming and washing floors burns calories too!  I feel a sense of satisfaction in that not only am I changing myself, but I'm changing the "world" around me.  I have gone through my closet and got rid of most of the clothes in there and hopefully I will go through my dressers this weekend to finish that task.  I finally have room to store my new, smaller clothes!!!

I did run tonight and I didn't make it far.  I don't know if it is because I haven't run or maybe it just wasn't a good night but I will do it again on Sunday and push a little harder.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

I Did It, I Really Did It!!!

Oh hi!  Sorry I haven't been by in a while.  Busy, busy this week!  I took Saturday and Sunday off from running, so I had nothing to report.  However on Monday I got hubby to drive the kids to karate so that I could go for a run and I made it to 28 minutes AGAIN!!!!  Sweet!  I probably could have made 30 if I pushed really hard because I felt good. However 28 minutes was Couch to 5k Week 8 Day 2's goal so I was happy to have made the 28 again and save the 30 for day 3.

Tuesday I was a bad girl.  I have been really wanting a good burger and fries so my mom and I took the kids for dinner at a local favorite.  Soooooo yummy and totally worth the extra calories.  Then it was home to catch a hockey game.

Wednesday was here and I decided I was going to run again.  I accomplished a feat that night that I never thought possible.  I ran for 30 minutes.  If you had told me five months ago that I would be able to run for 30 minutes straight I would have fallen on the floor laughing my ass off!  I did it though!  I did, I did!!!!  That officially completes the Couch to 5k program time-wise.  However, it was still only about two miles.  So now I keep going until I get to 3 miles! That's my plan, we'll see how long it takes to get there.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Sometimes I Impress Myself

I finally made it to 25 minutes (running) again on Wednesday.  It took 2 1/2 weeks to get there but I finally got there.  That officially wrapped up Couch to 5k, Week 7 Day 3. 

Tonight, aka Friday, aka two days later, I really did not want to run.  I am PMSing and I want to eat everything.  I guess it's the one time of the month that I do want the bad stuff.  I was so tempted to stop at McDonald's and get fries instead of going for a run, but I didn't.  I got to my mom's and I still didn't want to run.  I didn't have my iPod, a good excuse I thought, but my mom said "go run".  So I dragged my ass and got changed, put on my runners and headed downstairs.

My shins screamed from the beginning.  I told myself "just 15 minutes" when I had already been running for 11.  By the time I checked the treadmill timer again I had been running for 21.  Well then, I can make it to 25 again, right?  Yup! Not only did I make it to 25 minutes, but I kept going and made it to 28 minutes.  That means I have successfully completed Week 8, Day 1 also!!!

Monday, February 18, 2013


I realized something last night. I have mentioned a couple of times not to deny yourself "treats" or you'll snap and binge. You want a chocolate bar, have 1/2. Share the rest with someone else or put it in a Ziploc for next time. If you want chips, eat chips, just measure out ONE serving, or better yet, a 1/2 serving! What I realized though is that I don't even have the "want" for the most part anymore. I think I need a snack and I have calories available, well, I'll have a bowl of chips. Nope, don't want that, have and I have something like celery instead! I'm not sure how that happened!!!

I really felt good on my run last night and I thought I was going to be able to make my 25 minute goal finally.  Nope, never mind, a pain in my side had me return to walking after 20 minutes.  Darn!  I was so there in my head!  I blame that second turkey taco wrap I had at dinner.  There's always next time!

Speaking of turkey tacos. . .I used ground turkey for tacos last night and it was delicious.  We use wraps for our soft tacos so we can make them pretty stuffed with meat and veggies.  Honestly, I am in love with ground turkey and I am not even a turkey fan.  Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving, I have a little and I'm done with it.  I have used ground turkey before, but I have to remember to use it more often as it was a great substitute for ground beef.

After you cook the ground turkey add taco seasoning and water, simmer until water is absorbed/evaporated.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

It's Okay to Cheat (Only on Food Though)

I have been absent for a week, so sorry.  As usual, not a lot to say so nothing to post.

I hit 178 this week.  I don't remember being 178 since I had my thirteen year-old son!  Some of my co-workers are telling me not to lose anymore, but I'm happy to lose as long as I can start shaping too.  I still have to work on a shaping plan but it will come.

I haven't been able to do a 25 minute run for two weeks.  I just can't make it.  It's frustrating, but I'm going to keep trying.  I know I will get there again eventually.

I had an awesome (planned) cheat day this week.  I had been wanting something deep-fried so I figured it was time to celebrate reaching my goal.  We had chicken wings and fries (so yummy) from Montana's!  I still weighed everything since it was takeout and I always weigh my food at home for accuracy.  Even if I know I'm going over on my calories, I like to keep track.  As I have mentioned before, once in a while you need to cheat. You need to indulge your craving so that you don't snap and fall totally off the food wagon.


Valentine's day was this week too, of coarse.  I ate a cupcake!  Red Velvet!  Yum!  I'm usually well behaved at work but I decided to give in to it this time.  Seeing as the 178 was reached after the wings and cupcake, it wasn't really a bad week at all!