Time to Get Serious. . .Again

Warning!  Extreme boredom ahead.  I needed to make myself accountable again so I kept a daily record in an attempt to be accountable for my choices.  You may skip to the last paragraph for my conclusion if you don't want to read on about the day by day accomplishments and defeats.

Day 1. . .168.4

I wanted to eat constantly and I spent most of the day on the couch watching Orange is the New Black.  I did 10 minutes of dumbbells and squats while I watched. I ended the day 53 calories over.  Not the best return.

Day 2

I ate breakfast early which makes for a long food day.  I had a banana and yogurt for a snack before lunch which was left-over, thin-crust pizza, and raspberries.  There was a snack before 2, and then I struggled to make it to dinner! After dinner I went for a run (finally, it had been a week). I upped the first 15 minutes to 4.3 then stopped to tie my shoelace and accidentally put it at 4.5 for a bit before I realized and dropped to 4.4.  I lasted 30 minutes total for 2.2 miles (plus .5 mile walking). I ended the day with a 257 calorie deficit.

Day 3

Did fairly good at being good today.  Except I planned to exercise but watched the rest of Orange is the New Black, Season 2 instead.  Oops!  I still had a 228 calorie deficit so I was satisfied.

Day 4

Good for food, failed at running.  I was determined to jog for a half hour starting at a 4.3 but failed horribly.  Fourteen minutes, uhg!!!  Tried a walking break then ran again but quickly realized I was done.  This is actually driving me nuts!  I'm supposed to be able to run 5k in 38 days!  Still, a 250 calorie deficit for the day.

Day 5

My son's birthday!  Plus, a baby shower at work.  Uh-oh!  Calories for the day. . .horrifying!  Not even going to discuss it.  (Hangs head in shame). 

 

 

Day 6

Work BBQ today!  Hot dog, Pepsi Next. . .and chips.  I have no will power.  However, despite being dead set against running tonight, I decided it must happen, even a failure at running would be something, right?  No failure tonight though.  I did the full 5k at a 4.2 jog!!!  Plus a 1/2 mile walking.  Sometimes I am proud of myself.  I ended the day with a 227 calorie deficit.

 

 

Day 7

And then I screw it up!  Sh!t!!! I tried so hard to be good.  Went to a potluck for dinner.  Tried to eat all the healthy choices.  For protein I had a burger patty with no bun.  Little did I realize that the burger patty had a million calories!  Okay, not really, but more then I budgeted for.  Once it was all added up I ended 450 calories over for the day.  Uhg!

 

Conclusion. . .166.8 (1.6 pounds)

Despite my determination to be good, I had two bad days.  I normally allow myself one "bad" day a week and that one day was planned for my sons' birthday.  However I was bad again on the weekend, although, it could have been way worse.  I will keep up the day by day accountability for at least another week as I do think it helped to make myself more aware.

Failing Un-miserably

I'm failing.  Mostly by choice.  Bad choices.  I've said things like this before and I'll say it again; there are always going to be bad patches.  Just don't let those bad patches define your journey.  Remember to always work toward the good.  If it were easy then everyone would do it.

I don't have a hard time with my bad patches anymore either because I am truly happy with what I have accomplished.  Maybe I will never reach my ultimate dream of 160, but I got pretty damn close.

 

At this point I'm happy with maintenance. That means if I want a cheeseburger I will have a cheeseburger. I know I had cheeseburgers occasionally all along, but I might have a cheeseburger more often now.  It's about balance I think.  I still like to eat healthy and control portions and choose my "junk food" carefully.  And I will always need many good days to balance out the few bad days.

My biggest problem I that I just haven't felt like running.  My big-fat-unmotivated-ass is making it's return!  I always talked about doing some other kinds of exercise but if I'm not running then I'm definitely going to need to get serious about doing other exercise regularly.  Now is not really the time to quit running though...my 5K is only 6 weeks away!  Must get motivated soon!!!



Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow

I wrote a letter about parting with my Fitbit Force:

 

Dear Force,

It is with great sadness that I have to say goodbye.  I lived in denial for many weeks, blaming the rash on wearing you too tight.  Telling myself everything would be okay.  However, the rash over-took both wrists and even blistered on the left, making me face the facts: You were just no good for me anymore.

While I waited for your return transportation to arrive, I spent so much time researching and deciding how to replace you.  The truth is, there is no replacement, but I reluctantly ordered a One.  This means that although I will receive $140 back for returning you, I have now wasted $100 on One.

Why is it a waste you ask?  Well, once Fitbit releases a product that can truly compare to you, my relationship with One will also end. . .only this time there will be no refund.  The $100 One will then join the dusty pile of outdated electronics on my computer desk and I will spend however-many-hundred dollars on the new product.  My relationship with One is necessary though because I truly cannot live without a Fitbit in my life.

We have had good times and bad times.  Since you arrived I have only left you at home one time, and that was because you didn't match my party dress (so sorry for that).  I will miss you greatly, Force, but I will always have the scar you left on my wrist as a reminder of our time together.   I hope you have a fabulous trip back to wherever it is that you are off to.  Know that you will be missed.



Force

One

 

So Close

I added another 1/4 mile to my run last night.  I am only a half mile away from 5K!  I am unbelievably excited about this!  I know that running outside really is going to be different though and I am actually scared of it now.  Scared?  Yes it sounds harsh, but there is no way I can go run 2.6 miles outside right now.  It will be pretty close to starting from scratch.  I need to start soon as Colour Me Rad 5K is only nine weeks away!

 

The good thing about Colour Me Rad is that it's not super serious and I'm going to want to slow down to get colour bombed anyway.  That doesn't mean that I wouldn't like to run 5K straight.  That would be the ultimate accomplishment!

 

 

 

Bad news.  Shin splint again, I think.  It's the other side this time.  I have just applied some KT Tape, and maybe it's in my head, but it feels better already.  Don't get me wrong, there is still pain, it just doesn't seem as bad.  I'm rocking some pink tape this time!  I plan to run tomorrow, so hopefully it helps.

 

I haven't weighed in recently, and I'll probably wait until next week now.  I have not been on my best behavior recently, but I am fairly confident that I can't possibly be gaining.

The Return (Again)

I know, I know. . .I don't post nearly enough but I can't tell you everything when there is nothing much to tell.

I reached a 2.35 mile jog again!  My first day back I ran for 30 minutes, but not the way I wanted to.  I had to split it into two 15's.  The next run I made the full 30.  The following run was a horrible first attempt at outdoor running!

I decided to walk/jog to my mom's because my daughter wanted to ride her bike there.  The shortest distance to get there is just under a mile.  The long way around is just over two.  Well, I quickly realized how hard it was and picked the short route.  Half way there I had an earache from the wind.  I didn't realize how windy it felt until I was out there!  We ended up getting a ride home because we stayed too long.  Let me just say that on Monday I went to the Running Room and bought a headband that covers my ears!  Not that I'll ever need it again, but I have it just-in-case.  I'm not giving up on outdoor running, I'm just gonna save it for a nicer day.

I returned to the treadmill yesterday and did a 2.35 mile jog.  It felt great to get there again.  Hopefully, I will get there again tomorrow.

I saw this post and immediately thought that it couldn't be closer to the truth.

 

This journey certainly has looked like the squiggle and it's not over yet!

(I originally published this about a week ago from my phone.  When I edited it to clean up the format a bit, it changed the date.  I do not recall that happening when I fixed up a post previously.)

 

Damage Done

It's time to get back.  Running was not possible due to the cold that I had but it really is time to get my ass in gear again.  I had stayed steady at 164 pounds until late in the week when we decided to go on an overnight trip to the US for grocery shopping.  I let all my cautions go out the window for two days and I did do some damage.  Five pounds!  How do you gain five pounds in two days?!?  You do that by eating a lot of (bad) food!  Day two (yesterday) was topped off by eating a lot more "bad" food at almost midnight so it probably wasn't a good idea to weigh myself this morning.

 

I will tell you this. . .eating that much "bad" food also leads to not feeling very well.  It's not like I ever eat "clean" but most of the time I am aware of what I am eating and limit the "bad" stuff.  I'm paying for my indiscretions with a headache and nausea.

 

I will return to running either this evening, or tomorrow, depending on how I feel.  I will aim for 30 minutes because I don't want to be set back too far.  If I don't feel well, I won't make 30, and I want to try my hardest to get there.

Running outside may soon be a possibility.  The thought of it brings on anxiety though.  I'm not sure why, other than a lot of things make me anxious.  I guess because I have to figure out the best place to go and run.  I'd like to run in the industrial area near my neighbourhood as there is not much traffic.  There are no sidewalks though and it's quite deserted in the evenings so then I worry about safety.   See, anxiety!

Out Sick Again

Okay, I figured out the constant need to eat all the time.  It's a cold.  I don't know why but when I'm getting a cold, I'm super hungry.  Maybe that's where "feed a cold, starve a fever" comes from.  

Another problem with this cold is that I have no energy (or lung capacity) to run.  I did manage a mile on Wednesday, and that was even before a cough had really developed.  Running is not happening again for a few more days at least. 

I received the best complement today and the person who said it probably wasn't even aware that it was a complement.  I was carrying a 5-gallon water jug (40 pounds) and she said "It amazes me that someone as small as you can carry that"! I'm "small". . .and strong(ish)!!!