Monday, January 16, 2017

A Whole New Lazy Big Fat Unmotivated Ass

I know I fell off the earth after my last post and I could give you a ton of excuses if I thought about it, but I really had nothing to say. It was exercise and food, that was all, I met my goal, then I blew it bad.

Let's call today "Day 0".  

After a weekend of bad, I weighed myself and it turns out that I weigh more then I have in FOUR years. Is that depressing? Hell yes! I looked in the mirror and I could see it too. In fact I saw it all day before I even weighed myself, and I already knew. (Yes, I weighed myself after dinner but it's not like I'm going to magically lose five pounds or more overnight!)

I have ALWAYS said you have to be ready to lose weight. I don't feel ready. The only thing I feel ready to do is cry. And I only have myself to blame. These feelings are kind of overwhelming because they are difficult to describe. I am angry with myself for sure. Yet I still have no desire to exercise.

I think because I know how long it took to lose and how dedicated I was may be what is making me angry with myself. I consciously let myself do this to me without really taking into account of how it would make me feel when it was time to deal with the consequences.

I am really hoping that this is just a bad day and that I can pull myself out of this funk tomorrow. I have food ready to be prepped and I must plan to exercise tomorrow night. Tonight I just might have to go to bed early to put this misery I feel behind me.

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